Getting Referrals
Dialogue 1 is a Mindset
I don’t have to tell you how important referrals are to creating a predictable, consistent, reliable income but what I would like to suggest is you will be amazed at how many more high-quality referrals you will get every day as you quickly and easily learn how to ask for referrals using these cards.
Below are questions and answers for Get Referral Dialogues
Dialogue 2 How’s The Market?
• Experience shows, it all depends on where you live.
• I would love to do some research for you and sendyou an email that will tell you what homes are for salenow, what homes have sold recently and how longhomes are taking to sell in your neighborhood.
• So you can feel secure in the knowledge that youhave the most accurate information.
• This timely information will tell you right away howyour market is right now!
• I imagine that information would be valuable to you,would it not?
Dialogue 3 How To Use The Word “Because”
• When a family member, friend or neighbor needsadvice about buying/selling/borrowing,
• please don’t keep me a secret
• because you want them to get the best possibleresult and be delighted that you introduced me,
• don’t you?
Dialogue 4 How’s Business?
• Things are going well,• and isn’t it nice to know that I have time for you,• your family,• your friends• or anyone else you know and like who could use myhelp right now?• I’m curious, who do you know who would love to owntheir own home• because when you introduce them to me, they canbetter understand what their best options are intoday’s marketplace?
Dialogue 5 How To Link Your Referral Chains (Call your whole chain using this dynamic Dialogue)
• After meeting with Larry, you call Bob and say, “Bob,thank you for introducing me to Larry. I met with himand he has chosen to work with me.• I will make sure Larry is delighted that you introducedme.• I’ll keep you posted on our progress.” Next, call Maryand say, “Mary, I just met with Larry and he chose towork with me.• The reason I’m telling you this is because Bobintroduced him to me.• Thank you for introducing Bob to me because withouthim, I would have never met Larry.
Dialogue 6 How To Get Your Number In Their Cell Phone Directory
• When would now be a good time• to put my name and phone number in your cell phonedirectory• because the next time you are in a conversation witha person who mentions they will bebuying/selling/borrowing,• you can easily take out your cell phone,• look up my number• and call me immediately,• which means they can get the help they need now!
Dialogue 7 You’re The Pilot; They’re The Passenger
• As your real estate/mortgage consultant,• I’m like the pilot of your plane.• My role is to get you where you want to go, safe andon time and• because I count on you to introduce me to the peopleyou care about,• would you do me a favor?• During the transaction, as I deliver beyond yourexpectation,• I’d like you to help me find more passengers.• Does that seem fair enough?
Dialogue 8 How To Have Casual Referral Conversations
• I was wondering if your best friend was going tobuy/sell/borrow,• do you know an agent/lender that you would feelcomfortable introducing them to?• If they say, “no” you say,• I would love to be the person you feel comfortableintroducing your friends to who need real estate/mortgage advice.• What would have to happen right now for us to makethat a reality?
Dialogue 9 How To Speed Up The Introduction Process
• (Client Name), who is the next person you know who is mostlikely to buy/sell/borrow?• Client: “Well, my father will be retiring soon and hasbeen saying for years that he wanted to sell his houseand get something smaller.”• You say,• What can we do together right now• to make sure he has an opportunity to meet me andspeak with me before he sells his home?• I’m sure you want to make sure he gets the bestadvice• so this transition is easy and profitable for him,• don’t you?
Dialogue 10 How To Tell People You Have Time To Help
• Hi, (Client Name), this is Joe. I know you’re busy so I’ll keep it brief.• I have time right now to help a few new clients who wantto buy/sell/borrow in the next 30 to 90 days.• I was going to place an ad in the paper asking, “Who doyou know who wants to buy/sell/borrow in the next 30to 90 days?”• Then I thought, before I start dealing with people neitherof us even know,• I thought I’d give you a quick call• and offer my time to people you know who might need it.• I’m curious, as you think about some of the people youknow who could benefit from my help,• who’s the next person you know who would love to own ahome?
Dialogue 11 How To Ask For Advice
• Hi (Client Name), two reasons I’m calling today.• Number one, I want to sincerely thank you for trustingme to consult, negotiate, and oversee the transactionaldetails for you when you bought/sold/borrowed.• I’m truly grateful.• Number two is to ask you for some advice.• Imagine...If you were me, and you were a realestate/mortgage consultant and you want to help morepeople who need real estate/mortgage advice• and you only want to help people who are introduced toyou by the people you already know.• I’m curious, what would you do to encourage others tointroduce people to you?
Dialogue 12 How To Ask For Introductions
• Who’s the next person you know that is most likely tobuy their first home?• I know you know someone.• As you continue scanning through the people youknow who need my help,• who comes to mind first?• I’m curious,• what do you think would be the best way to introduceus?
Dialogue 13 How To Turn Compliments Into Referrals
• “Thank you for all that you have done.”• You say, My pleasure, (Client Name), you’d do the same for me.• You can always count on me and I know I can alwayscount on you• to introduce me to the people you care about• because you want your family, friends and neighbors• to get the best advice when it’s time to buy, sell, orborrow, don’t you?• Who is the next person you know that is most likely tobuy, sell or borrow?
Dialogue 14 How To Get Specific When Asking For A Referral
• You say, (Client Name), please don’t keep me a secret.• The client says, “I tell people about you all of the time.”• You say, Experience shows that following up onintroductions• makes it more likely that your friends will get the helpthey need.• (Client Name), when you say you tell people about me all of thetime,• I’m curious to know,• who, specifically, have you talked to• that has mentioned they want to buy a larger home in adifferent neighborhood?
Dialogue 15 How To Challenge People’s Inactivity
• I know you are a very busy person.• I also know you’re the sort of person that goes out ofyour way to introduce your friends and family to aperson you really believe in [touch your chest],don’t you?• I’m curious, do you believe in me enough tointroduce me to the people you really care about?• They say, “Yes.”• Now, if you were me, what would you do to go aboutintroducing me to the people that you think are mostlikely to need my help?
Dialogue 16 How To Get Into A Referral Conversation
• The client says, “My mom is thinking about moving/refinancing.”• You say, “Would you be comfortable telling yourmom about me?”• “Yes.”• You say, “I know that telling your mom is the easypart.• I also know that getting me and your mom into aconversation is the hard part.• I’m curious, what do you think the best way would beto make sure that your mom and I get into aconversation very soon?”
Dialogue 17 Please Don’t Keep Me A Secret
• (Client Name), please don’t keep me a secret!• (Watch and listen to what happens.)• They may say, “I tell all my friends about you.”• You say,• Thank you and I know you will continue to do that.• I wonder if any one of your friends have a specificreal estate/mortgage need right now.
Dialogue 18 How To Deal With Referral Reluctance
• (Client Name), I appreciate that –• I’m glad that you trust me enough to be honest withme (pause)• and a few months from now,• when your Dad is calling you and thanking you forintroducing me to them,• you’ll look back on this moment and laugh about howyou’d been slightly concerned before you decided tointroduce me to him,• and feeling good• because they are people you care about• and I imagine you want them to get the best advicepossible from someone you believe in [touch yourchest], do you not?
Dialogue 19 What To Put On Your Business Card
Print the following on the back of your card:• Imagine me as your real estate/mortgage consultant.• What I do for you is invest my time consulting,negotiating and organizing the details of yourtransaction because you want to have a superbexperience that causes you to want to introduce meto the people you care about most.• The purpose of my business is referral,• which means I must bring the type of value thatmakes you feel comfortable• introducing me to the people you know that needmy help.• After all, a referral is sending someone you careabout to someone you trust.
Dialogue 20 How To Compare And Contrast Yourself
• There are two parts to every transaction:• the product and the process.• For example, can you tell me what your favorite localrestaurant is?• Is it your favorite because they have both great foodand great service?• Imagine that the food is the product and the serviceis the process.• I’m curious, does your favorite local restaurant domuch advertising?• Probably not, because their food and service are sooutrageously good, most of their business comesfrom repeat guests and referrals, does it not?• For just a moment, can you imagine that I’m just likeyour favorite restaurant?
Dialogue 21 How To Use Quotes To Embed Commands
• I was talking to a friend of mine who bought a housefrom me last year.• She said she was talking to a friend who also boughta house from me last year.• She told me that she said my negotiating skills aloneare worth every penny they paid• and because of that, she said she’s going to• introduce me to the people who need my help.
Dialogue 22 How To Reframe Bad Referral Experiences
• I understand.• A great client of mine, Larry, told me that he didn’t likegiving referrals because he had a bad experience, too.• I’m curious, are you comfortable telling me whathappened?• (Listen to the story)• I’m not going to tell you that it will be different with me,• but I will tell you how I will conduct myself with yourfriend and then you can tell me how comfortable youare with my approach.• Does that seem fair enough?
Dialogue 23 How To Help People Feel Good
• Imagine how good you’ll feel when you introduce• the people you care about to a person you really trust[touch your chest].• Imagine how good you’ll feel• when your friend thanks you for introducing them• to a person like me,• who can help them.• Imagine how good you’ll feel• when you know that your family and friends• are getting the advice they can count on to make theirdreams come true.
Dialogue 24 Asking For Another Referral
• (Client Name), thank you for introducing me to Larry.• He told me that he shared with you what a great job Idid for him.• Is that true? (Yes)• I heard a man named Joe Stumpf who is a founder ofa company called BY REFERRAL ONLY say,• “When a client refers you to a person and you do agreat job for them,• there is a 50% chance that they will introduce you toanother person.”• I’m curious, (Client Name), do you think that is true?
Dialogue 25 How To Discover If People Will Refer
• Joe Stumpf, the founder of BY REFERRAL ONLY, saidthat when it comes to referrals, the population isdivided into three groups.• He said that 15% of the people will refer me withoutme even asking.• Another 15% won’t refer me because they don’tpromote under any circumstance• and 70% of people will refer if I ask them in anintelligent way.• (Client Name), I was wondering, what group do you think youfall into?
Dialogue 26 What Do You Do?
• Thank you for asking.• The best way to describe it is with a quick story.(Tell the story of how you helped a client without usingthe words “I” or “me.” For example, a young couple justmoved into a new home and kept their house paymentslower than their rent.)• That’s what I do. I make dreams come true.(Refer to the previous story, for example, people whorent.)• I’m a real estate/mortgage consultant.• I’m curious, if your best friend lived in an apartmentand they wanted to buy a home,• do you have a real estate/mortgage consultant thatyou feel comfortable introducing them to? (Waitfor their answer).• What would have to happen for you to feel reallygood about introducing me to someone you careabout?
Dialogue 27 Isn’t It Nice To Know?
• Isn’t it nice to know that the phone number you justcalled me on is the same number you can give toyour friends• when they need real estate/mortgage help?• Isn’t it nice to know that I will give your friends thehelp they need to reach their goals?• By the way,• who is the next person you know that is most likely todo what you just did?
Dialogue 28 How To Help People Help You
• The next time you’re in a conversation
• with a friend from work, church, or your country club(name more groups)
• and they mention that they are interested in (specifictransaction that you can help them with)
• please don’t keep me a secret.
Dialogue 29 Q How To Avoid Awkward Silence Q
• Eventually when you do come across a person whoyou think I could help,• keep in mind that I am never too busy to help yourfriend, family member, or neighbor• in the same way I’ve been able to help you,• so the next time you’re in a conversation• and a person mentions that they need realestate/mortgage help,• I’d like you to please call me immediately.• What happens when you imagine yourself doingthat?
Dialogue 30 How To Handle Rejections
• Thank you for thinking about it.
• Now that we have talked, chances are, you maynotice people who need my help.
• Would you be comfortable if I checked back with youin a few months to see if anyone comes to mind?
Dialogue 31 How To Choose Referability
• You can affirm these three statements aloud withconviction:• I love the thought of receiving two great referralsfrom each of my current clients• because I am highly referable.• I love the thought that today I have decided to gettwo great referrals from each of the people I talk to inmy sphere of influence.• What I think about, I talk about and what I talk about, Ibring about.
Dialogue 32 Assume Everyone Knows Someone
• I don’t know if you have already begun to notice• friends, family members and neighbors• who can benefit from knowing about• my consulting, negotiating, and organizational skills.• The next time you’re in a conversation• with a friend, family member or neighbor• and they mention that they would like tobuy/sell/borrow,• I know you wouldn’t want them to miss out on the kindof benefits I’ve helped you get,• so I’m wondering• how quickly can you pick up your cell phone and callme so that I can start helping right away?
Dialogue 33 How To Talk to Their Unconscious Concerns
• You’re probably already aware that when youintroduce me to a friend, family member or neighbor,• I will always respect the confidentiality of ourrelationship,• and I vow never to share anything about your privatebusiness with them.• I know this is important to you• and I imagine knowing this will make it even easierfor you to introduce me to• some of the people you care about• who might need my help.
Dialogue 34 How To Give Specific Instructions
• Here are three simple steps to follow in the days andweeks ahead when you’re in a conversation with aperson who mentions they are considering buying orselling a home or getting a loan.• Step 1. Take out your cell phone.• Step 2. Look up my phone number.• Step 3. Call me immediately.• When we talk you can tell me what you think wouldbe the best way to get into a conversation with theperson you want to introduce me to.
Dialogue 35 How Good Can They Feel?
• In the past, what has it been like when you introducepeople to products and services that you really like,and they have a really positive experience?(Listen to their answer) and then say...• Think of how good you’ll feel knowing that you’vemade a positive difference in the lives of your friendsand family• by telling them about me.• I’m not going to say,• “Introduce me to the people you care about,”• because only you know the people who are in thebest position to benefit from my services,• isn’t that right?
Dialogue 36 How To Discover Their “Hot Words”
• I’m curious to know,• what’s important to you when you refer your family,friends and neighbors to a real estate/mortgageconsultant?• Listen for the exact words they use, then describewhat you do for others using their “hot words.”
Dialogue 37 How To Use The Feel, Felt, Found Formula
• Thank you for taking the time to think about it. Iunderstand how you feel.• A good friend of mine, Larry Anderson, felt the sameway when I asked him to introduce me to people hecared about• but he found that a few days after we spoke,• he started noticing family members and friends whowere talking about buying larger, more spacioushomes.• I’m wondering, would you be comfortable if I checkback with you in 30 days to see if you found anyone?
Dialogue 38 How To Orchestrate Referral Introductions
• In the event that you come across someone,• I’m wondering,• would it be OK for us to talk about the best way tointroduce him or her to me?• If you were me• and you wanted to get into a conversation with yourfriend,• what do you think would be the best way to do that?
Dialogue 39 How To Deal With People Who Don’t Refer
• That’s fine,• and I’m curious to know,• is that because you aren’t entirely comfortablediscussing introductions in general,• or is it because no one’s come to mind yet,• or is there something that would have to happen foryou to get to the point where you can feel entirelycomfortable introducing me to someone who couldbenefit from my help?
Dialogue 40 How To Use “Happy” Instead Of “Satisfied”
• My purpose is for you to be so outrageously happywith the help I give you• that you’ll gladly introduce me to at least two peopleyou really care about before I even sell your home, orhelp you buy a new home or close your loan.• In fact,• if you agree that you’re outrageously happy withhow I’m helping you,• I’m going to ask you to introduce me to someoneelse you know who needs my help.• Does that seem fair enough?
Dialogue 41 How To Plant A Referral Seed On Your Voicemail
• Thanks for calling.• This is (YN), your personal_____ consultant for life.• I will be back in the office after an inspection• to return phone calls between noon and 1pm.• At the sound of the tone, please leave your name andthe number where you can be reached.• Also, the next time you’re in a conversation with afamily member, friend or coworker• who mentions they are currently renting,• can you picture yourself calling me up• and letting me know who they are?• I have a list of great homes that they can live in• for about the same amount of money they are payingin rent.• Have a great morning• and I will talk to you between noon and 1pm.(Customize the message accordingly)
Dialogue 42 How To Introduce Yourself In Social Settings
• I’m (your name) and (Client Name) are my ideal clients.• Let me tell you what it’s like to be their realestate/mortgage consultant...• (Client Name) are some of the friendliest, most authenticpeople that I have had the privilege to consult andnegotiate for.• All throughout the process of helping thembuy/sell/borrow,• they were willing to answer some thought-provokingquestions• so I could take the time to craft a strategy• to help them figure out what was important to them.• (Client Name) trusted my advice• and today they are comfortable recommending meto the people they care about.
Dialogue 43 How To Ask People To Refer People Like Themselves
• Who is the next person you know• that is most likely to do what you just did? (Describein detail what your client just did in his/hertransaction.)• I know you know someone.• It may be a person in your family, maybe a friend or aneighbor.• It may be a person from your church or maybe yourwork.• By now, I know you know someone.• I’m curious, who comes to mind first?
Dialogue 44 How To Help Your Client Recognize Your Value
• When your client says, “Thank you,” you say... That’sOK,• you’d do the same for me.• Thanks for letting me know.• Can I ask you to share some of the things you valuedmost with me?(When the client shares with you what they most value,you have created the optimal atmosphere to ask for anintroduction.)
Dialogue 45 How To Help People Get Comfortable
• First, I’d like to say “Thank you” for trusting meenough to be honest with me.• Second, I’d like to ask, “What happens when youimagine• a family member, friend or neighbor calling you withtotal gratitude• because they just sold their home/bought a newhome/closed their loan• and you know that the tremendous value and advicethey received was all due to your introducing themto me so that I could help them?”
Dialogue 46 How To Use The Word “Neighbor”
• It’s nice to know that like a good neighbor,• I’m always here to help you, isn’t it?• And I wouldn’t advise you to introduce me to yourneighbors• until you feel absolutely certain that you can trustme• in the same way that you would a good neighbor.• The next time you hear about a friend or neighbormoving,• please don’t keep me a secret.
Dialogue 47 How To Use The Word “Friend”
• Isn’t it nice to know you have a friend in thebusiness that you are comfortable referring thepeople you care about to?• It’s good to have a friend in the business isn’t it?• You might become aware of how good you feelwhen you let the other agents know that you have afriend in the business.You can sign all of your letters,• Your friend in the real estate/mortgage business.
Dialogue 48 How To Use The Word “Family”
• What happens when you start to refer to your clientbase as your “family” of clients?• How good could you feel as you say to a new client,“Welcome to the family”?• Can you call your client event “Family Reunions”?• How might you describe your process of how you dowhat you do using the word FAMILY as a mnemonic?• F - First we analyze your needs• A - Actively find you a home/buyer/loan• M - Meet all contractual obligations• I - Integrate all our work and initiate a settlement date• L - Let’s all come together and celebrate ...because...• Y - You live in your new home!
Dialogue 49 How To Get Past The Fear Of Asking
• I choose to let go of the outcome and get attached tochanging my behavior.• Every time I ask for an introduction or plant a referralseed, I have a small victory.Imagine how good you’re going to feel once you’vepermanently adopted this behavior.
Dialogue 50 How To Explain the Selfish Benefit
• (Client Name), there is another benefit for you in introducingme to your friends during your transaction that you mayor may not already be aware of.
• (Client Name), you probably already know that the most time-consuming part of any business is finding new clients.
• What I would like to suggest is in the days andweeks ahead, when you have sold your home/closedyour loan,• you will look back and feel great that you introducedme to your friends during the transaction• because it allowed me to invest the maximum amountof my time, energy and resources into you,• rather than looking for new clients.
Dialogue 51 How To Suggest You’re Compensated Two Ways
• First, I work on a contingent basis versus a retainerbasis,• which means as your consultant, negotiator, andoverseer of all details,• I invest all of the up-front money and time to help youmake your dream come true.• Only when your dream comes true,• do I actually receive compensation.• Then of course, the second way you compensate me is• in the form of your recommendations and introductionsto your friends, family and neighbors that you careabout.• Does that make sense?
Dialogue 52 How To Use “Introduce” Instead Of “Refer”
• My purpose is for you to be so outrageously happywith the help I give you• that you’ll gladly introduce me to at least two peopleyou really care about before I even sell your home/help you buy a new home/close your loan.• In fact, if you’re delighted with the help I give you,• then I’m going to ask for the names of the first twopeople you’re most eager to introduce to me• so I can help them.• Does that seem fair enough?
Dialogue 53 How To Feel Comfortable Asking For Help
• My purpose is for you to be so outrageously happywith the help I give you• that you’ll gladly introduce me to two or more peoplethat you really care about• before I even sell your home, help you buy a newhome or close on a loan.