The Conversation You’re Avoiding
Why Silence Feels Safer Than Clarity
Most families don’t avoid planning because they’re irresponsible.
They avoid it because the conversation feels uncomfortable.
What if she gets upset?
What if he thinks I’m being dramatic?
What if talking about it makes it real?
So silence feels safer.
But silence doesn’t prevent pain.
It only postpones clarity.
And postponed clarity has a cost.
In Keep Your Life™, I remind families that discomfort today often prevents regret tomorrow. A calm, imperfect conversation now is kinder than a rushed one later—when emotions are high, and options are fewer.
Because Planning requires assumptions.
And one dangerous assumption is believing there will always be a better time.
Here’s the question worth sitting with:
Whatever happens to your parents or to your spouse, will you be able to give your love and keep your life?
And another, just as important:
Can you look your kids in the eyes and promise, no matter what happens to me, you’ll be able to give me your love and keep your life?
Those questions aren’t meant to pressure you.
They’re meant to protect you.
Give your love, keep your life.
Not someday. Not when it’s easier. While it’s still calm enough to choose.
You don’t need perfect words.
You don’t need to solve everything.
You just need the willingness to stop postponing clarity.
Still waiting for the “right time”? CHECK THIS OUT.
Because silence is not a strategy.
Clarity is compassion.
And the earlier you define support, the less it ever costs.
HOMESCHOOLING: Haven or Havoc?
Your child's school years are precious and fleeting.
Now could be your best time to step up where your school is letting your child down. Let this series of myth-busting short chapters encourage you.
2 Major Mistakes
Which one will you make?
Which of these 2 retirement mistakes are you making right now? It's impossible to entirely avoid both mistakes.
You won't know for sure which mistake will work out better for you until it's too late.
How to choose?
Finding the Will
(Part 1)
Part 1: Have the will to arrange for a smooth transition when you’re no longer around to answer questions
Have the will to arrange for a smooth transition when you’re no longer around to answer questions (Part 1)
Ensuring your children or other Loved Ones can readily access your important papers when you die entails a sound process versus one or two conversations. You must overcome aversion to the subject of death, procrastination of anything that is long-term, and the tendency to assume things will be fine. Family dynamics can be sweet, spicy, or dicey.
Finding the Will
(Part 2)
Part 2: Getting Organized
While the internet permits convenient access to accounts, policies, and stored documents, it presents a plethora of password management problems. which too many people avoid by succumbing to password laziness, such as:
- re-using passwords for multiple logins, or
- use simple, easy to remember passwords, or
- writing them on sticky notes placed on their monitor or under their keyboard, or
- keeping them in a spreadsheet on their computer, or
- letting their browser remember passwords for them
Embrace Your Clarence
Is Clarence your future?
Golden insight from a golden retriever.
Post-Pandemic W.E.L.L.ness
Working, Earning, Learning, and Launching to Thrive
Where life drastically changed forever two years ago, everyone adjusted to the best of their abilities.
Here are a few of the key adjustments--"pandemic pivots"--that sustained some and prospered others.
Prenuptial Adulting
Equip Them for Happily Ever After
“Mom, Dad, we’re getting married!"
“Wonderful, congratulations! Here’s what you both need to do first.”
Equipping newlyweds with essentials of responsibility leaves plenty of life yet to be discovered on their own. Adults understand that love isn’t oogly feelings; it’s a hard choice. It’s putting your commitments and your money where your mouth is.
Many of the following steps also apply to one’s turning 18 years old. Becoming engaged adds urgency and a deadline.
Rethinking Competing Funds for College and Retirement
We live in a time of skyrocketing inflation topping decades of unbridled higher education costs.
Is the tension between funding your retirement and funding (at least partially) your children’s college education keeping you up at night?
You’re not alone.
Married? Is Your Endgame 100% or Just 50%?
Are you single? That other 50% could be whoever is most important to you.
Multiple unforgiving players factor into your retirement and estate plans (collectively your “endgame”). Household names include the Internal Revenue Service, the Social Security Administration, and the Center for Medicare and Medicaid Services. Key decisions with these players are nearly impossible to reverse. Plus, if you qualify for a pension, how you activate it is another irreversible decision.
Are you more of a planner than your spouse? It’s all too common for one spouse to blindly trust the planning spouse. Countless endgame “plans” were created by 50% of a couple:
