Ending the Book of Funerals
It is preferable to bury the dead in a laḥd (an ‘L’-shaped grave with a recess at the bottom, facing the qibla), 450 and build a partition of unbaked bricks [sealing the recess] as was done for the Messenger of Allah (SA).
وَيُسْتَحَبُّ دَفْنُ الْمَيِّتِ فِيْ لَحْدٍ، وَيُنْصَبُ عَلَيْهِ اللَّبِنُ نَصْبًا، كَمَا فُعِلَ بِرَسُوْلِ اللهِ .
449. Burying the dead is a communal obligation by consensus.
450. The Prophet (SA) said:
“Laḥd is for us, and shaqq (a pit or a regular grave) is for others.” (B – from Ibn ‘Abbâs)
اللحد لنا والشق لغيرنا.
The shaqq is a regular grave with a trench, the size of the deceased, dug in the middle of it and enforced with bricks. The deceased is placed on their right side facing the qibla, then the top of that groove is covered with unfired clay bricks or stones, and finally the dirt is filled in. The laḥd is a grave where a recess is dug at the bottom, on the side closest to the qibla, in which the deceased is placed on their right side facing the qibla; then unfired clay bricks are placed behind the deceased, and finally the dirt is filled in.
While the shaqq is disliked according to (A), it is acceptable if necessary, such as when the nature of the land is unsuitable for the laḥd. It was reported that the Companions (RAHUM) wondered which method to use for the Prophet’s grave, and that means that the shaqq was also used during his time.
451. Thus, burying the dead in caskets is disliked unless the land is too soft or wet, in which case it becomes acceptable. There is also no harm in doing this if mandated by the law of the land.
In addition, coating the grave with plaster is disliked (A/SM) because:
“The Messenger of Allah forbade using plaster to coat a grave, sitting on it, or erecting any structure on it.” (M – from Jâbir) In another report, “…writing on them, building on them, or stepping on them.” (T – from Jâbir. al-Albâni:S)
نَهَى رسول اللَّهِ أَنْ يُجَصَّصَ الْقَبْرُ وَأَنْ يُقْعَدَ عليه وَأَنْ يُبْنَى عليه.
The grave should not be covered with anything permanent.
(A) + (+M, +S) maintained that it is makrooh to write on the grave in any case, because of the hadith of Jâbir above.
(-H, -as-Subki) permitted writing on it if there is a need to mark its location or to prevent its being treated with disrespect. This is because the Messenger of Allah (SA) carried a rock and placed it by the head of the grave of ‘Uthmân ibn Madh‘oon (RA), saying:
In all cases, writing should be limited to the purpose of identifying the grave.
452. (A): He must be laid on his right side, facing the qibla with his chest. (+H, +M, +S): After placing him in the grave, three handfuls of soil may be thrown in succession over his head, as it was reported, with controversial transmission, that the Prophet (SA) did this. (Ma – from Abu Hurayrah)
Raising the Graves
Of the rulings related to graves is the prohibition of raising them. ‘Ali ibn Abi Ṭâlib said:
“Should I not instruct you to do as the Messenger of Allah (SA) instructed me? Do not leave a statue erect without obliterating it, and do not leave a raised grave without leveling it.” (M – from ‘Ali)
ألا أَبْعَثُكَ على ما بَعَثَنِي عليه رسول اللَّهِ أَنْ لَا تَدَعَ تِمْثَالًا إلا طَمَسْتَهُ ولا قَبْرًا مُشْرِفًا إلا سَوَّيْتَه.
(A): The sunnah is to raise them one shibr (about the distance between the extremity of the thumb and that of the little finger when extended apart, which is estimated to be about 23 cm). Raising them more than that is disliked. (A): Building masjids on graves is forbidden.
Consoling the relatives of the deceased is recommended. 453
وَيُسْتَحَبُّ تَعْزِيَةُ أَهْلِ الْمَيِّتِ.
Crying over him is not disliked 454 as long
وَالْبُكَاءُ غَيْرُ مَكْرُوْهٍ، إِذَا
Ibn Ḥajar al-Haytami considered it a kabeerah (a major sin) and said in az-Zawâjir, “Masjids and domes built on top of the graves must be swiftly razed.
” Sayyid Sabiq said in Fiqh us-Sunnah:
Included in general ahadith tackling raising the graves are dome buildings and shrines built on graves, for they all constitute the graves as masjids. The Prophet (SA) cursed those who did that. The practice of erecting buildings around graves and beautifying them causes corruption, which Islam suffers from. Part of such corruption is some people's belief in them, which is similar to the belief of the disbelievers in their idols and their glorifying of them. Hence, they thought that they may benefit and harm them, similar to the superstitious belief of the ignorant. Thus, they travel to these graves for fulfillment of their needs or achievement of their goals. They ask those in the graves what believers should ask only of their Lord. They ride horses to them, touch them, and seek their aid.
453. Some of the scholars of Hadith described as reliable the hadith in which the Messenger of Allah (SA) said:
“No believer gives condolences to his brother except that Allah will dress him in a suit of the suits of honor on the Day of Judgment.” (Ma, Ba – from ‘Amr ibn Ḥazm)
ما من مُؤْمِنٍ يُعَزِّي أَخَاهُ بِمُصِيبَةٍ إلا كَسَاهُ الله سُبْحَانَهُ من حُلَلِ الْكَرَامَةِ يوم الْقِيَامَةِ.
The Prophet (SA) sent a messenger to his daughter after her son died, saying:
“Verily to Allah belongs what He took, and to Him belongs what He gave, and everything has an appointed term with Him, so let her be patient and seek the reward.” (B – from Usâmah ibn Zayd)
. إِنَّ لِلَّهِ ما أَخَذَ وَلَهُ ما أَعْطَى وَكُلٌّ عِنْدَهُ بِأَجَلٍ مُسَمًّى فَلْتَصْبِرْ وَلْتَحْتَسِبْ.
454. The Messenger of Allah (SA) himself cried when his son Ibrâheem died, and he said:
“Verily the eyes shed tears and the heart feels sad, but we say not except what pleases our Lord, and most certainly we are saddened by your departure [separation], O Ibrâheem.” (Ag – from Anas)
إِنَّ الْعَيْنَ تَدْمَعُ وَالْقَلْبَ يَحْزَنُ ولا نَقُولُ إلا ما يَرْضَى رَبُّنَا وَإِنَّا بِفِرَاقِكَ يا إِبْرَاهِيمُ لَمَحْزُونُونَ.
Many of the righteous predecessors did not show any sadness upon the death of their loved ones, due to contentment with Allah’s decree. The Prophet (SA), however, combined that quality – demonstrating it by not saying anything displeasing to Allah – with that of mercy, indicated by his weeping. That is more perfect than demonstrating either one of them alone.
455. Eulogy
The nadb that is forbidden is a form of eulogy where the deceased is called aloud by his good traits, as in, “O brave soul,” “O generous husband,” etc. The truthful mention of the deceased’s good deeds is sanctioned and was done by the Prophet (SA).
He also warned against cursing the dead or mocking them, saying:
“Do not insult the dead, for they have already faced the consequences of their doings.” (B – from ‘Â’ishah)
لَا تَسُبُّوا الْأَمْوَاتَ فَإِنَّهُمْ قد أَفْضَوْا إلى ما قَدَّمُوا.
There is an exception made for public tyrants and sinners who spread corruption, so that people may be deterred from following in their footsteps. The evidence for this is that the Companions praised a dead person and criticized another in funerals. The Prophet (SA) said about the praised one, “Paradise is his confirmed destiny,” and about the dispraised one, “Hellfire is his confirmed destiny.” He also said to his Companions (RAHUM):
“Whomever you praised, paradise will be his due destiny; whomever you criticized, hellfire will be his due destiny. You are Allah’s witnesses on Earth.” (Ag – from Anas)
من أَثْنَيْتُمْ عليه خَيْرًا وَجَبَتْ له الْجَنَّةُ وَمَنْ أَثْنَيْتُمْ عليه شَرًّا وَجَبَتْ له النَّارُ أَنْتُمْ شُهَدَاءُ اللَّهِ في الأرض أَنْتُمْ شُهَدَاءُ اللَّهِ في الأرض أَنْتُمْ شُهَدَاءُ اللَّهِ في الأرض.
456. Gathering to Console the Family of the Deceased
All scholars recommended consoling the family of the deceased, for those who come across them at the mosque, the market, or any other place. As for gathering at a certain place to extend condolences to them, the scholars differed.
(A) + (+h, +M, +S): It is makrooh; some went as far as saying it is haram. This is because ‘Abdullâh al-Bijali (RA) said:
“We used to consider gathering with the family of the deceased and making of food after the burial as [part of] wailing.” (A – from ‘Abdullâh al-Bijali)
كُنَّا نَعُدُّ الِاجْتِمَاعَ إِلَى أَهْلِ الْمَيِّتِ وَصَنِيعَةَ الطَّعَامِ بَعْدَ دَفْنِهِ مِنْ النِّيَاحَةِ.
This hadith was authenticated by many scholars but criticized by some others.
They also argued that there are no reports that the Prophet (SA), the Companions, or the righteous predecessors held such gatherings. (a) + (-H, -m): It is allowed to sit in a certain place to receive condolences for three days.
Many contemporary Ḥanbalis and others support this as long as there are no other abominations or innovated practices involved. They cited a hadith saying that when a member of ‘Â’ishah’s family died, the women would gather for some time and then leave, except her own kin and friends. (Ag) They also argued that in our times, it is much harder to encounter the family members and console them unless special arrangements are made for this. Finally, they argued that makrooh acts become permissible if there is an overriding benefit.
It is important to note that this discussion merely concerns the act of gathering. Sometimes the gathering is mixed with other disliked or forbidden acts. For example, it is disliked for the family of the deceased to make food for the visitors (unless there is a need, according to Ibn Qudâmah). In fact, people should make food for the family, as the Prophet (SA) said:
“Prepare food for the family of Ja‘far, for they were afflicted by what would make them distraught.” (D, T – from ‘Abdullâh ibn Ja‘far. T:S)
"اصْنَعُوا لِآلِ جَعْفَرٍ طَعَامًا فإنه قد أَتَاهُمْ أَمْرٌ شَغَلَهُمْ."
Additionally, it is disliked to incur a lot of expenses out of arrogance and a desire to show off. There is also no basis for gathering on the fortieth day after death or on the first anniversary.
There is no harm in men visiting the graves. 458 One should say when passing by them or visiting them, “Peace be upon you, dwellers of an abode of believing folk. Inshallah we shall follow you. 459 [//] O Allah, do not deprive us of their reward or misguide us through trials after them, and forgive us and them. We ask Allah for safety for us and for you.”
وَلاَ بَأْسَ بِزِيَارَةِ الْقُبُوْرِ لِلرِّجَالِ. وَيَقُوْلُ إِذَا مَرَّ بِهَا أَوْ زَارَهَا: سَلاَمٌ عَلَيْكُمْ دَارَ قَوْمٍ مُؤْمِنِيْنَ، وَإِنَّا إِنْ شَاءَ اللهُ بِكُمْ لاَحِقُوْنَ، [//] اللّهُمَّ لاَ تَحْرِمْنَا أَجْرَهُمْ، وَلاَ تَفْتِنَّا بَعْدَهُمْ، وَاغْفِرْ لَنَا وَلَهُمْ، نَسْأَلُ اللهَ لَنَا وَلَكُمُ الْعَافِيَةَ.
457. The Prophet (SA) said:
“I used to forbid you from visiting the graves, but now visit them//for they remind you of death.” From two different reports (M – from Buraydah)
نَهَيْتُكُم عن زِيَارَة القُبُور فَزُورُوها، فإنَّها تُذَكِّرُكُم المَوْت.
458. Can Women Visit the Graves?
(A) + (+m, +S): Disliked.
(a) + (-H): Permissible (-M: for older women). It was reported that ‘Â’ishah (RAH) visited the grave of her brother ‘Abdur-Raḥmân (RA). (H, Ba) But women may not do this frequently or if there is fear for her security or of fitnah, for the Prophet (SA) said:
“May Allah curse those women who frequently visit the graves.” (T – from Abu Hurayrah. T:S)
لَعَنَ الله زَوَّارات القُبُورِ.
459. This part has been reported by (M). The rest (after the [//]) has been reported with a weak chain by (Ma).
Any good deeds he [the living person] does while intending the reward for the deceased will benefit him [the deceased]. 460
وَأَيُّ قُرْبَةٍ فَعَلَهَا، وَجَعَلَ ثَوَابَهَا لِلْمَيِّتِ الْمُسْلِمِ، نَفَعَهُ ذٰلِكَ.
460. This matter is controversial; the best argument for the above position is what Imam Ibn al-Qayyim (may Allah bestow mercy on him) said: Worship is of two types: financial and bodily. When the Legislator informed us that the reward for charity reaches the dead, He indicated that the reward for financial acts of worship reaches them, and when he informed us that the reward for fasting reaches the dead, He indicated that the reward of bodily acts of worship reaches them. He also informed us of the reaching of the reward of Hajj, which is both a financial and bodily act of worship. Thus, these three types [of acts done by the living for the benefit of the dead] are supported by both the revealed texts and reason.
This includes the reading of Qur’an. This is the position of (A) + (+H, +m, +s, +t). As for gathering to recite the Qur’an and grant the reward to the deceased, this particular form has not been reported from the Prophet (SA) and his Companions, but Imam Ibn Qudâmah said in al-Mughni that “Muslims throughout the different lands and ages used to gather and recite the Qur’an for the deceased without condemnation.” Therefore, those who regard the act as innovated may abstain from it, but they should not condemn those who regard it permissible, because there is a scholarly disagreement.
(A) + (+H, +M, +S): The only exception is that the mandatory prayers are not prayed on behalf of the deceased. If someone offers a mandatory prayer, they may not give away its reward to anyone else. Finally, the things that reach the deceased, by agreement, are supplications and charity, so these are the most encouraged.